Recently I was having a conversation with someone who was mentioning that she finds it hard to stay in shape once she begins dating someone. I totally get it: when you get into a relationship, all of a sudden you might find yourself wanting to stay in bed and cuddle instead of rush to sunrise bootcamp; to go out to romantic restaurants and indulge in 6-course meals and all of the wine on a weekly basis.
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But to me, being a healthy, confident, taken woman means finding balance between your romantic relationship, and the relationship you have with yourself. And a big part of that healthy self-relationship revolves around nourishing yourself with good food, being at a healthy weight, feeling attractive, and finding time for endorphin-boosting exercise and other healthful activities.
I’ve been with my hubby for 8 years now, and I’m certainly very lucky to have found him. While he’s an easygoing guy who has made it pretty easy for me to lead an active, healthy lifestyle, there are definitely some things that I’ve learned along the way, and healthy habits that I’ve developed in my life as half of a couple. So whether you’re in a brand new relationship or have been with your significant other for decades, here are some tips I have for staying/getting in shape when you share your life with a better half!
1.) PORTION CONTROL. This one’s applicable to everyone, but specifically geared to all of my straight ladies out there: You do not need to keep up with your man’s diet and eat as much as him!
In general, men are bigger and tend to have faster metabolisms (Ugh, don’t even get me started about how unfair it is that my hubby unintentionally loses weight, when I have to bust my butt for weeks to lose a few pounds!), so they need to eat more, especially if they exercise as my guy does. Most of the time, I eat about half the amount that my hubby does, if not even less. I also eat from smaller bowls and plates, which might seem silly, but it makes a big difference in my feeling satisfied by my pretty little meal, versus his big ole meal that has more than my stomach can and should handle.
So, if I make grilled cheese, I make 2 for him and 1 for me. If we do veggie burgers and baked potatoes, I eat one burger and 1/2 a potato, and he eats 2 with 1 1/2 potatoes. You get the point – it’s called portion control, and it’s probably the most important factor to staying in shape!
2.) HAVE COZY AT-HOME MEALS. I definitely enjoy a nice meal out here and there, but it’s no secret that when you dine out, you tend eat more calories. Keep the romantic restaurant occasions at a moderate amount, and do some at-home cooking! Preparing a meal together is a fun way to bond, plus it’s also a way to be able to ensure that your meal is healthy.
It doesn’t have to be a big extravagant meal or event, or it can be if you’d like it to be. I’ve done many dinners at-home where I fancy it up by pairing the food with a good bottle of wine, making dessert, lighting candles, and putting on good background music, but let’s be honest, normally I just whip up a nutritious & delicious meal for my hubby and I to enjoy in under 30 minutes flat.
(PS – This is also a way to save money as a couple!)
3.) TRY NEW WORKOUTS AS A COUPLE. On a daily basis my hubby and I don’t exercise together, but we love to do adventurous outdoor workouts together. Some of my favorite memories are from us on crazy hiking adventures – like our weekend at Catalina Island, Hiking to the World’s Largest Ice Cave, or our afternoon hiking Three Sisters Waterfall. I also like to get out of my comfort zone, like earlier this year when I went skiing for the first time with A in Lake Tahoe. The workouts can be whatever fits you two as a couple. How about trying indoor rock climbing or taking a new fitness class with one another? Or challenging yourselves to train for a race together? Whatever it is, the point is to get active and have fun doing it.
4.) MAKE TIME FOR YOUR OWN HEALTHY HABITS. Just as I stress trying out new workouts as a couple, I also think it’s important to set aside time to be on your own doing healthful things. Go to weekly Zumba classes, plan dates with your girlfriends to get smoothies then go for a long walk (I do this often!), head to Whole Foods to explore and purchase some new foods you’ve never tried. It’s not healthy for you or your partner if you lose yourself in the relationship, so make sure you carve out time for nurturing your self-relationship in healthy ways.
5.) MAKE LONG WALKS A HABIT. I admit that having a dog certainly helps with making long walks a habit, but there’s no reason that you can’t be wracking up your daily step count even without a pooch. You can make it routine to go for a walk around the neighborhood after dinner, or on Saturday mornings, or whenever works best for you two. After awhile, those 30-minute walks add up and can make all the difference in helping to keep you in shape.
6.) SET YOUR HEALTHY INTENTIONS & MAKE THEM CLEAR. So maybe you have a partner who isn’t all that concerned with staying in shape or isn’t into healthy living. While that’s unfortunate and certainly makes it more of a challenge than if you had a significant other whose on the same page as you, you’re more likely to develop and stick with healthy habits if you let your feelings be known. Let him/her know that while they maybe aren’t planning on exercising that weekend, you would like to fit in a workout one day. Or make it known that while you enjoy dessert here and there, you don’t want to be stopping at the ice cream shop on a nightly basis. Setting expectations for what kind of lifestyle you lead or want to begin leading makes things clearer and sets boundaries in your relationship, plus it also makes you more likely to stick to those healthy plans once you’ve verbalized them.
Tell me… What tips would you add to the list? Do you sometimes find it hard to lead a healthy lifestyle when you’re involved in a romantic relationship?
Britt@MyOwnBalance says
Great list Nicole! I definitely practice portion control with the Hubs and since he is big eater (although somehow really thin), it works out well. Also, finding common healthy interests helps. BB (before baby) we cycled a lot and played tennis. I am hoping we can get back to that at some point!
foodielovesfitness says
Both of our guys eat a lot & are thin!! I’m sure that you two will find ways to stay active together with baby Cooper strapped to your back or something! 🙂
GiGi Eats says
I always lose a bit of weight when I start dating someone. Or when I am in a relationship for that matter because I have so many stomach problems and I really don’t want to deal with them around him, so I try not to eat too much!
foodielovesfitness says
Oh no, that’s no fun! Interesting.
Ali says
These tips are great! I’ve been in relationships where the guy doesn’t eat healthy, and it definitely makes it harder for me to stay in shape. I think it’s great that you and your husband workout together!
foodielovesfitness says
Thanks, Ali!
Dannii @ Hungry Healthy Happy says
My husband has become my workout partner and we love hitting the gym together. It is nice to be able to spend some time together and also do something productive as well.
foodielovesfitness says
Totally agreed!
Anna says
Great points, especially the one regarding portion control. It’s so easy to just pile the plates evenly without thinking about the fact that our bodies are different and need different amounts of food. Good idea to use different sized plates! I also completely agree on cooking at home. Healthy living and eating has been a focal point for us since we started dating (my bf had to get used to healthier eating and smaller portions after living with his bacon and creamy-everything loving guy friend!) and turning it into a couples activity is such a good idea. We do exactly what you do! Candles, wine, good homemade dinner, and we’re set. I think you covered all the important bases with this list, so there’s nothing I could think of to add!
foodielovesfitness says
Sounds like you’ve got him into some great healthy habits! Wooohoo!
Lauren @ ihadabiglunch says
The smaller plate trick has always helped me. If I don’t fill my plate I mentally feel like I didn’t get “enough” 🙂
I love couples who work out together — that’s the healthiest couple in my opinion (no pun intended).
foodielovesfitness says
I 100% agree about the small plate trick!
Kaylin @ Enticing Healthy Eating says
I just had to say I really enjoyed this article and I think these are some great tips. Well written, too! I’m planning on sharing it on my blog facebook page next week. 🙂 I’ve slowly been moving my own man, my boyfriend of 4 years, towards a much healthier lifestyle than he had when we first met. Plus he’s always supported my own healthy lifestyle, which I love!
Kaylin @ Enticing Healthy Eating says
Also, I just read your About Me page and I started in IIN in January this year too! I just graduated and I assume you did as well! Yay!
foodielovesfitness says
YES! Awesome!! We’ll have to chat more about IIN, and I’ll definitely be checking out your site.
foodielovesfitness says
Thanks so much for reading, Kaylin! That’s great that he has always supported your healthy lifestyle – and that’s how it happens – they slowly start adapting healthier habits too! My hubby now likes so many more healthy foods than he used to. He was putting avocado and tomato in his omelette when family was visiting recently and they were like, “Who are you??” I just say that I’m a good influence 🙂